In 2012, I was the same age as the victims of the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School. At seven, I was naive enough to believe that nothing like that would ever happen again, that the murder of 20 children would open people’s eyes and make them realize that young lives are more important than their ability to own a gun. In 2018, I watched news reports of the shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, FL. Again, I assumed this situation would be the last. At 13, I had seen history repeat itself, but continued to believe the cycle would end with what I had just seen. 

At 17, I am beginning to lose hope. Kids are still being killed at the hands of AR-15s that have no place in our society. On March 27, three children and three staff members were shot and killed at the Covenant School in Nashville, TN. 

Evelyn Dieckhaus, William Kinney and Hallie Scruggs were nine years old; practically babies with their entire lives ahead of them. Staff members Mike Hill, Katherine Koonce and Cynthia Peak were crucial members of their school community, parents and grandparents and, above all else, human beings. All six of them were people just like us, with families and friends, whose futures were ripped away from them by murder weapons that we have convinced ourselves we have the right to use. 

For as long as I can remember, school has meant learning mathematics, reading books, spending time with my friends and hiding in the corner of darkened classrooms once a month. I don’t flinch when “LOCKDOWN LOCKDOWN” blares from the speakers. I know not to leave the classroom right when the fire alarm rings, waiting instead to ensure it isn’t a ploy from a shooter to get us all in the same place. 

But that isn’t normal. It isn’t normal to live in a country where more shootings have happened so far this year than days that have passed. It isn’t normal to fear for my life each day of school, hoping that my friends and I won’t be the next ones in the photos on the news, accompanied by politicians’ “thoughts and prayers.” Something must be done. 

The lack of action from our government on gun laws and restrictions is genuinely frightening. Instead of working to make our country a safer place, politicians are undoing and unraveling any hint of progress. On the same day as the shooting in Nashville, a federal judge signed off on a Tennessee settlement allowing people as young as 18 to carry a handgun without a permit.

We must pass nationwide gun regulation. Aren’t we tired of watching history repeat itself over and over? An interview with grieving parents should not be a weekly segment; memorials outside of elementary schools should not be commonplace. 

We cannot continue to let children die at the hands of an ignorant government while we sit on the sidelines, turning our backs and pretending that we might not be next. 

I don’t want to fear for my life in classrooms. I don’t want the second amendment to be used as a shield against responsibility. I don’t want to hear your thoughts and prayers. I want change. 

Photo credit: “School was my safe place” by Carwill Bjork-James is licensed under (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)